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Spouses of sexual addiction

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You've been hanging out with this guy for a while and everything is great. That's what you tell people. The truth is, everything is not so great. Things he says and does don't add up.
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Do’s and Don’ts for Helping Your Addicted Spouse

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Could My Spouse's Sexual Addiction Be the Cause of My Betrayal Trauma?

Though it seems counterintuitive, her husband of 36 years was an intimacy anorexic, withholding from her both physical sex and emotional affection. We lived totally separate lives in the same house. Wives of sex addicts are a lonely and neglected group, according to Doug Weiss, a psychologist and executive director of the Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colo. In his latest book, the second edition of "Partners: Healing from His Addiction," Weiss studied more than partners who, like Michele, struggle with their self-esteem and sexuality. He found that 82 percent experienced depression, 62 percent dealt with an eating disorder and 39 percent were, as a result of their husband's intimacy anorexia, also withholding of love and affection. More than a third "can't do intimacy. But their wives also have emotional issues that need to be addressed, according to Weiss.
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When Your Husband Is a Sex Addict

Sexual addiction is similar to other addictions. First, the behavior is compulsive. Second, the person continues their behaviors even when they know it is harmful. Third, the addiction becomes their priority.
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Sexual addiction and compulsive sexual thoughts and behavior lead to increasingly serious consequences, both in the mind of the addict and in his or her life. These consequences can include profound depression sometimes with suicidal thoughts , chronic low self-esteem, shame, self-hatred, hopelessness, despair, helplessness, intense anxiety, loneliness, moral conflict, contradictions between ethical values and behaviors, fear of abandonment, spiritual bankruptcy, distorted thinking, remorse, and self-deceit. Sometimes sex addicts will engage in multiple behaviors with the risk of addiction; for example, combining drinking and drug use or gambling with their sexual behaviors to help ease the pain of their emotional struggles.
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